And today we all lament the defeat of Ken Jennings on Jeopardy. The poor guy couldn't identify H & R Block!?! Geez, any 68 year old blind former railroad worker could have answered that question. Maybe he threw the game! I mean, let's face it. The guy has probably been thinking of nothing but income tax for the last 6 months. How could he possibly get that wrong? Immediately following his defeat, H & R Block was ready to capitalize on the instant publicity by offering him free tax advice for life. Maybe they put him up to it! a-HA!
And then there's NYC real estate lawyer Rhonda Gaynier, who is suing over airport security patdowns. She described her pat-down at the hands of a Tampa TSA agent as the most humiliating experience of her life. CNN reported her description of the pat-down, saying the agent "touched her on her shoulders, under her arms, around her waist, across her bra strap, and between her breasts." Rhonda, seriously, you've got bigger problems than this pat-down. That's the most humiliating experience of your entire life? You can't think of anything that has ever happened to you that was more humiliating than that? Honey, that's not humiliation. Now if they had tied your hands behind your head, lifted your shirt, twisted your nipples, then chained them together with clamps, stripped you down, took a strap to your bare ass, the whole while saying to you, "Yeah, you like that, don't you beyotch? Who's your Daddy? Take it. Take it, you dried up old raisin. Moan for me, yeah, that's it. You love it." Rhonda, that would be humiliating. But having a security guard make sure you're not strapped with wires and dynamite, making the rest of us safer on airplanes... that's not humiliating. Seriously. Get a life.